Recharging – The Introvert Edition
Hello friends. Happy Sunday evening. Did you have a good weekend? I’m recovering from having what I’m pretty sure was the flu this past week, so our weekend was pretty low key – which is my favorite kind of weekend!
After a few weeks of almost solid, day long meetings at work, work travel, and illness, I’ve been thinking about how I recharge. What fills my bucket back up. What keeps me from getting super overwhelmed and crabby. I fall firmly into the introvert camp, and the older I get, I think the scales tip more heavily towards introversion. I think there is a misconception that being an introvert means you are shy, or don’t like being around people, and maybe for some people who are introverts that’s true. But really, the difference between someone who is extroverted and someone who is introverted is where they draw their energy from. An introvert draws energy, or recharges by being either in a small group of close friends, or through alone time, while an extrovert is energized by people, and often large groups of people.
Personally, I draw my energy from being at home, typically in my studio, and working on something creative. Sometimes the creative activity can be writing, or painting, or journaling, or learning something new. But I always feel better once I create something. Even if it’s just throwing paint on paper with no intended outcome. Often when I’m in a crazy season at work, my husband will strongly encourage me to make time to spend in the studio. Even if it means he has to take on the bulk of the weekend household tasks himself. I realize how lucky that makes me, and I appreciate him even more because of it. He also feels like it is self preservation on his part because I get real cranky when I haven’t created for a while.
I also draw energy from super deep conversations with close friends or my husband. A few weeks ago I had a three hour phone conversation with one of my friends that I hadn’t talked to for YEARS. We talked about so.many.things. I left that conversation feeling recharged, energized and honestly a bit raw. I’ve kept thinking about it for the past few weeks. There were so many good nuggets in there. We also made no small talk, which for a lot of people would be awkward. I don’t think we touched on the weather, or on what we do for a living – two of the most common topics of conversation in the US (at least where we grew up). But here’s the thing, that type of conversation doesn’t work for everyone, which both of us acknowledged as we were chatting. For some people, that type of deep conversation would be draining. For both of us, it was so energizing.
A few weeks ago I posted about my top five CliftonStrengths and talked extensively about Futuristic and Ideation. One of my other top five is Relator. Gallup describes Relator’s power and edge as ‘People especially strong in Relator talents form solid, genuine and mutually rewarding relationships. Their relationships are close, caring and trusting. They may know many people, and they can relate to all kinds of people. But they also have a very small group of friends with whom they have incredibly deep relationships.’ This, for me, aligns closely with how introversion shows up in my life. It has also helped me understand my recharging needs better.
I think the biggest key to recharging is just knowing how you recharge, and not feeling bad about it. For years, I felt like there was something wrong with me because I need so much alone time, and I felt weird for wanting to have those deep meaningful conversations. Now I’ve come to realize I’m in a much better frame of mind and show up so much better when I do have that time to recharge. If I could combine a painting retreat with my favorite friends – even better 😉
How do you recharge? Do you need quiet? Or are you energized by people and lots of activities? Or maybe you’ve never thought about how you recharge? If so – let me challenge you to think about it, and then take some time to do something that refills your bucket!
